2011, I have learned!!

Yet another year is coming to an end! How different are we now than from the start of the year? Would we rather be what we were at the start of the year or have we grown up in a positive way this year? Have we loved enough this year, have we made a difference to someone's life this year?

Personally, I feel I have grown up a bit more this year. And have learned some good lessons:

1. I have learned that the best way of dealing with a conflict is to talk it out straight with the person in question - whether professionally or personally. If you do discuss with others, be ready to be swayed in a direction you might not want, or worst still - make a big issue of something small
2. Your work is not your life, it is just a part of your life. There are more important things in life than work.
3. Quitting is not a answer to the problems. You fight till the end, even if you fail you would have tried.
4. My worst fear is not of heights or ghosts but of losing people I love the most.
5. Health is wealth - cherish it and make all efforts to keep it in good shape!
6. The best holiday is when we go back home - it is only then that we actually rest! Take at least once a year.
7. It is important to dress up and look good :-)
8. No one else can make you feel bad about yourself unless you allow them to.
9. You need time with your girlfriends to keep you sane! My Sundays are usually booked for them.
10. Above all, I have learned that life is most beautiful when it is shared with loved ones! Find a colleague you love, love your family, spend time with your loved ones as much as you can! Happiness is right there.

Leia Mais…

45 lessons from a 90 year old!!

Written by Regina Brett, 90 years old, of the Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio. Forwarded by an acquaintance

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come...
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
 45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

Leia Mais…

11!!

11 is considered to be an auspicious number in the Hindu tradition. Doesn't come as a surprise that the 11th country I visited is my favourite place so far. Earlier this month, I went to New Zealand and fell deeply in love with the country. Apart from an awesome company, there were many things which I loved about my trip to New Zealand. Let me try to summarize it in 11 points.

1. The place is an untouched paradise. It is too beautiful to be believed and very well preserved. It seems that all the beautiful photos of scenery and houses have been pasted right in front of my eyes.
2. The people surely are very helpful. They always give way, help people out and the place is quite safe.
3. I did skydiving from 15,000 ft at Queenstown with an amazing view
4. Nevis bungy from 134 m, in between the mountains and falling just above a fast flowing river
5. White water rafting in Rapids of class IV even when I have just started learning how to swim
6. Got a speeding ticket of a good amount and burst into laughing about it
7. Drove like crazy for 10 days but the drive was totally worth it with beautiful scenery all around
8. Stayed in all kinds of accommodation ranging from 5 star hotel to haunted palace to home stay
9. Saw Haka Dance by actual Maori live in front of me
10. Saw very distinct animals and plants, and of course cattle grazing on the mountains like in Bollywood movies
11. With this, I cover all inhabited continents of the world.

New Zealand is definitely a must visit place from my side.

Leia Mais…

The choice between giving my all and giving up!!

Have you ever thought of quitting something - school, a job, a relationship, a society? I am sure all of us have thought of quitting something or the other at some point of our lives.. Sometimes it might be for a simple reason of being bored and the quest of finding something better, however, more often than not - it is from the fear of failing. People prefer to quit rather than fail.

Having had a few downs in one day, I was going to quit my goal yesterday, something for which I have been working since early this year and very rigorously since past couple of months. I was sure of my success until yesterday when I had a few set backs and I thought - "This isn't working, I don't think I have the energy anymore" Result - I had fever this morning and no will to go to work.

I just spent the day to choose between giving my everything in the next 20 days for what I have been working for, or just give it up. In the end, I chose the former. I will be disappointed if I fail but I will not be able to face myself if I give up. So here I am, all ready to be back in the game after a short break!!

Leia Mais…

Control Game!!

Why do relationships/dating turn into a control game? "I will sms him only 3 days later, I can't call her now or she will gain control.." One of my friends even has a rule in her relationship of a couple of years to call her boyfriend only after he has called her 3 times - no matter how much she wants to talk to him, she wants to stay in control.

Isn't it ironic that we are playing manipulative mind games with the one person with whom we are supposed to be closest to, to let our real self be out with. If there is no self expression in the relationship then is it really worth it? Why can't one just drop a sms with just a smiley in the middle of the day to the guy one is dating for the fear of exposing one's vulnerability? 

Let go of the control.. Be the one who is vulnerable because then you experience the most beautiful aspect of being with someone - security in all circumstances. And that is the real control..

Leia Mais…

A couple of steps ahead!!

Earlier I used to have a section on my blog which stated my goals - usually about learning something new. I removed that section a few months back as I had made no progress whatsoever in achieving them for the past 4 years, except of course in the goal of visiting 30 countries by the age of 30 (Touching down on my 10th one in 2 days' time)

In the last month, I started making progress on 2 more. Cooking and Swimming - the latter being something I had wanted to do since I was a kid. Now cooking came effortlessly, probably from helping mom in the kitchen and asking her the recipes, and I became a good cook from my very first dish - now is just about improving it and experimenting a bit. Swimming needs to be learned still. Had my first lesson last week and I loved every aspect of it.

I am just happy that I took a proactive action to do things I have always wanted to do instead of waiting for the right moment! No moment is right unless you work on making it so.

Leia Mais…

Hello ME!!

It is good to meet myself again after over 2 months.. Back to enjoying life and being happy even after 13 hrs of work.. Back to saying a heart-felt "Have a good evening" to the security guard while leaving office.. Back to saying thank you with a big smile to the lorry driver who waited at the zebra crossing while I was crossing the road..

Being sick sucks big time and I become a grumpy old lady when I am sick.. Almost recovered now, I feel alive!! Back to being ME :-)

Afterall - "Zindagi Zindadili ka naam hai, Murda dil kya khaak jiya karte hain" 

Leia Mais…

To Each His Own!!

I always wonder why do people want others to be like them, to enjoy what they enjoy, do things like they do and think like they think. That's why we end up liking people who are like us or are like who we want ourselves to be. A person who drinks alcohol would like the others to join, bosses like their employees to behave like them. I like my sister to be like me :P

Aren't we all meant to be different? If so, then why are the people who are different usually not very welcome anywhere. Why are they always bitched about? I have suffered from being asked to blend in too and most importantly, I have been guilty of judging people who are different. We live in a world where there are no absolutes. Everything is subjective - there is no right or wrong. Who gives us the right to decide that we are right and the other person is wrong.

So many times when we end up judging people, we don't take into account so many factors - the background, the past, the family, the education.. Nothing is constant for everyone in the world, except for the fact that we are all living. We all have different set of conditions, even though they might differ very slightly. Hence, the comparison doesn't make any sense. May be if we had the same conditions like the other person, we would have been exactly like that person. So lets give people the benefit of doubt and accept them as they are!!

Leia Mais…

Being Self-Righteous.. NOT!!

Do you feel embarrassed about being right sometimes? About being a self-righteous person willing to put someone else down? Is being right and more importantly being acknowledged for being right so important? May be it is.. But is it worth it?

Two arguments with 2 close friends on something absolutely insignificant - that is my score for the week. Result - I couldn't prove that I was right, I upset them and then I felt down for making such a big fuss about almost immaterial things. And you know what is the worst of it all, I did not even apologize for what I did because I was too embarrassed about what I did.

No, I do not advocate that we should not stand up for what is right, what I am contemplating is that is it worth to prove that you are right about things which have no significance in your life whatsoever. Things which won't matter a few months down the road. I know I am guilty of doing it far too many times than I can remember.

Next time, I will try my best to not make a fuss about things that don't matter.. Spend some time probably to weigh the pros and cons of the argument before getting into one. One doesn't need to prove that she is right.. It is all about the state of mind.. And it is always great to be open to ideas and grow oneself even more as a person..

Let's not take life too seriously or make ourselves too significant. It is all about spreading happiness to whoever we reach out to.

Leia Mais…

Choice!!

My grandmother shared with me a wonderful advice over 10 years back:

" When we are teenagers, we think we have the power to change the world and set everyone right.
When we grow slightly older we realize that the world might be slightly difficult, lets stick to changing our country;
Some years later, we move to changing only the city, then only our society, then perhaps our family;
And right when our time is over we realize, may be we should have started by changing ourselves and the rest would have followed"

It took me over 10 years ( and thankfully only 10) to realize the truth of this advice. As of 12:30 pm today I have realized that managing myself is probably the most difficult task I have been entrusted with while I live. I should have been in the gym at 12:30 instead of cuddling up in my bed; I should have been blogging sooner rather than after almost a 7 months break.

Life is all about the choices we make, moment by moment. Some of these choices are the big life changing ones, while the others can be pretty small ones like choosing to write this blog post rather than day dreaming. Our life after all is a sum of all these choices we make. As Dalai Lama says that it is a human tendency to choose something that gives you pleasure or doesn't make you uncomfortable. However, one should rather opt for choices which give you happiness. 

A logical question is - Aren't pleasure and happiness synonyms? Well, no. Pleasure is something that lasts for a short time (might take you down for a guilt trip later) whereas happiness is long lasting. It might be uncomfortable in the start but it always leads to happiness, needless to say no guilt trips.

I now choose to be a bit more disciplined in life from now. The first step is to stick to the exercise plan for the Great Wall of China Marathon preparation. I have come up with a 5 days a week exercise program of my favourite exercises in the gym. And the second is to update this blog at least once a week.

When I named the blog "Lead the Change, Unleash the Development", it was more for leading the change in the world. From now, I change the context. It is driven more inwards. Lead myself to change and develop.

Leia Mais…